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Jean’s Story

I found SafeNet through a flyer.  I called and got an appointment to see a counselor/ advocate.  My counselor/ advocate helped me see different options and helped me navigate through difficult times…

Success?  I’ll say!

In 1998, I left my husband of 19 years because there was something wrong with me.  I couldn’t do anything right according to him.  He was mean and called me every dirty name in the book.  He threatened to take my  children away because he decided I was a bad mother.  I was stupid, unable to remember the easiest things.  He would wake me up in the  middle of the night and threatened to throw me out. He threatened to hurt my family, I was rarely “allowed” to see my parents and siblings.  I was isolated.

He had to have girlfriends because they understood him.  He would blame me for everything that wasn’t right in his eyes.  Later, I would learn this kind of treatment is abusive.  Verbally, emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and sexually abusive. I was an emotional wreck and afraid.

At the time, I didn’t realize abuse is more than just physical violence.  The emotional, mental battering leaves deep invisible scars that take a long time to heal.  He used threats and words as weapons.

I found SafeNet through a flyer.  I called and got an appointment to see a counselor/advocate.  My counselor/advocate helped me see different options and helped me navigate through difficult times, like my divorce and custody matters.

I learned what the characteristics of the abuser are, what the cycle of violence means and what power and control are all about.  This wasn’t my fault.  This behavior was his choice and he wasn’t going to change.  I kept my appointments and joined the weekly support group which I participated in for 3-4 years.

When SafeNet offered training for volunteers, I signed up.  I began to volunteer as a counselor/advocate.   Today, I am a strong, confident and happy person.

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